10 signs you may be a victim of emotional abuse

Emotional abuse is a very terrible place to be for anyone and more often than not it is difficult to pick up the signs when is on the receiving end.

That is because a lot of the time it comes from a place of manipulation, so the realities around the issue are often not as obvious as in other circumstances.

So here are 10 signs that could help you see if you are in an emotionally abusive situation.

Victim blaming: The abuser makes you feel all the bad things in your life are entirely your fault. It can become so invasive and penetrating that you begin to believe in it yourself.
Decisions made without consultation: This one is huge. Decisions get made for you, about you, without even the slightest bit of consultation. We see this often in intimate relationships where the party with power manipulates situations so badly the weaker one starts believing that decisions they find uncomfortable could be for their good.
Insults: This is targeted at demeaning and lowering the self-esteem of a person. They pummel it so bad that the victim sometimes even sees it as a form of affection. Being insulted becomes the drug and self-confidence is shot. Because they wait to get out of that bad space to get the approval of the abuser.
Social disconnect: Your friends start disappearing and there are two reasons. Either the abuser has kicked the friends to the curb or they find you have changed so much they really can’t understand you anymore.
Jealousy: A text message, a Facebook friend of the opposite sex. So many things. A jealous spouse will harang their partner and anyone else who dares come and talk to them. The key is to insulate them against the world and treat everyone as an enemy. And again, this is based strongly based on victim-blaming.
Blaming you for something they did: So they screamed at you or treated you terribly. For some reason, the level of manipulation is such that they will make you believe you made them become this horrible person. It’s like on Eminem’s Kim, “ Quit crying, bitch! Why do you always make me shout at you?!”
Ghosting: The abuser can just disappear emotionally or even physically. No responses to text messages or whatever. Calls ignored. No explanation is given and it is left to the victim to figure it out.
You start questioning yourself: This is a toxic one. You start double, triple-checking yourself to avoid situations that could disappoint the abuser. If not disappoint, could result in criticism or conflict. You feel even guilty for wanting something they possibly may not agree with.
You want to be alone: When you are alone, you feel better. And that is especially time away from the abuser. That is the moment there is freedom and there seems to be a life away from the manipulative situation.
Your opinion doesn’t matter: Feeling undermined is such a dark space to be. Sometimes it gets so bad that even in recounting events, your experience is collapsed into that of the abuser. Even if you are correct, your voice does not matter.

Well, we hope you can find this helpful. We will be publishing an article on what you can do to deal with emotionally abusive situations in due course.